Friends who are very different to us!

[Gemini]

I am lucky in having lots of friends. Friends are very important to me, more so as I get older. I feel friendship is a 2 way street, both parties work to maintain it, like any other relationship.
My friends are of many types. Younger and older than me, mothers and grandmothers , and childless, career women and not career orientated, straight and gay, religious and non believers... and so on.

Differences are good, it is what makes us individual. Someone doesn't have to be just like me to be my friend!

However, I have one friend who is so different to me I don't know how we are friends!!
She is in her 40's, and we have been friends for 15 years or more. Not only does she not have children, she actively dislikes them! I never discuss my GC with her. She hates summer and loves winter. The opposite of me. Her politics are the complete opposite of mine. She can count her friends on the fingers of one hand, and is proud of it. She generally doesn't really like people!

However, she is totally non homophobic, loves animals including cats, and we both struggle with our weight. I guess we have those things in common!

Do any of you have friends who are different to you in many ways?

[Elisi]

Oh yes indeed I do

I have a best friend who is a Jewish lady of 71, who looks around 55, who is an actress/singer, ,with flame red hair. She doesn't act anymore, but she is what they call a TORCH singer and lives and works in London. She has a great voice, a commanding presence, and is completely different to me in every way and we have been best mates for 48 years now. Never married, so no grandchildren! Is my daughter's 'Aunty Pru'

Then there is the lovely lady I treasure dearly, and she married an Australian in the late 70's. I went there for a month's visit, she came back in 2010, we are in constant touch and she became a grandmother this February She is a Born Again Christian, and extremely houseproud, (I am lazy) and would never contemplate divorce (I have)! and our thinking is eons apart, but over 48 years we have shared a sisterly relationship.

Another dear friend I have known for 25 years, a quiet, almost nun-like, religious lady, gentle, kindhearted, sweet natured, never a bad word for anyone, lives alone, is often penurious, but asks for nothing. Her daughter took her own life a while back and my gentle friend suffers greatly with this burden, but through her faith understands she is in good hands.

Another good mate, a business lady, dislikes having pets but loves animals, no children, very wealthy, kindness heart imaginable but takes no prisoners. 20 years our friendship and it is brilliant!

So, yes, we are all so different and those differences in our friends often compliment our own personalities so very well. I have at least another 3 friends I don't see that often, but when we talk, it is as though it has only been minutes since we last spoke.

And then, I have all my friends on GRU

[aggie]

I feel I have acquaintances rather than friends , one woman I paint with , one I bowl with and one at the Wednesday club , all different one a lot younger and the other two much older , but I never feel I can talk freely to any of them . Eldest DD is getting to be my confident because she now understands me better

[Plantaholic]

Because of my connection with Guiding and now belong to Trefoil I have lots of friends there, some I am closer to than others. I have one very special friend who I swim with, shop with and have been on holiday together. We are both chatty people and have lots of laughs. Very sadly her dear husband is in intensive care at the moment due to flu complications. I want to give her a hug but she is constantly at his bedside, she is a true friend.

[Oma]

Yes my SIL`s Parents are our best friends and totally different from us , I have mentioned before how she is the sweetest person you could wish to meet , they are both very reserved they laugh and joke but not like me and Brian we belly laugh at everything , He is a very quiet man but has a wicked dry wit and we tease each other all the time She wouldn't dream of swearing and finds good in everyone she is like my sister to me I love her dearly. Josh says about them that they are the serious Gran and Granddad we are the mad Nana and Granddad , we spend lots of time with them and go on holiday together . Opposites do attract in this situation . I can tell her anything and I know without doubt it will go no further . Brian tries to get her to swear and she thinks its so funny she will say things like Oh sugar and Brian will say go on Dorothy say SH** you know you want to and she is tickled pink by him . I also have a friend who is very outspoken and can be a bit dominating but once I say tone it down she does we have been friends since school so we know each other very well , we don't see each other often but when we do we carry on chatting like we had only seen each other the day before

[Daisy]

It's wonderful to have good friends, and it seems us GRU-ers have the best!

I've got quite a few friends who I don't see very often - mainly because of distance. We have friends visiting from Canada this month - and we've been friends for 45 years and although we haven't met up for 10 years I know we'll just pick up where we left off. Someone we made friends with on holiday 37 years ago and had always kept up the friendship moved into this area from London about 5 years ago so it's lovely we see so much more of them now. My lovely friend who looks after Clyde when we're away was originally a neighbour. We've both moved house since then, but are still in the same village and we see each other several times a week. I've found that technology has made it much easier to keep up with the lives of friends who are far away, and I think that's a huge benefit of social media. One friend who started out as a pen friend when we were 11 is a bit of a globe trotter but social media enable us to keep up with each other regularly.


Aggie - I wonder if the people you mention actually think of you as a valued friend? I bet they do. It must be lovely to have a DD who is also a friend. I find I have different sorts of friendships with different people, and I see both my DILs as friends, even though they are so different from each other.

[Qwerty]

I have friends I socialised with in Round Table for those who don't know its a young version of Rotary you have to leave at 40 they all live local but unfortunately some have passed away but we are at a stage where we just send each other xmas cards and meet up for a big lunch once a year, but I wouldn't say I would confide in them. My best friend is 40 this year much younger than me and we have known each other 16 yrs she didn't want any children nor her OH but she always asks and enjoys me telling her about them, its not a long time but I feel I can confide and do she works with my DS so know him pretty well, I also have a friend I enjoy but her morals are not what I like she is on her third marriage and many affairs as well but I have to say she is a good mate to me. Then there are my OH friends he has had from school and we all meet up with spouses a few times of year

[Glammanana]

My very best friends I can count on one hand everyone else I know are really acquaintences that I have met over the years either at work or through my DCs and OH,my very best friend lives
in Alicante and I used to work for him years ago I have always kept in touch with him and his family and when they lived here in UK we very nearly moved to Northumberland where they had their home,we both ran an office for a London based firm here in Liverpool and you know when you just know you are going to get on with someone,well that was how it was and he still keeps in touch on a regular basis,my other friends are girls I went to school with and one a neighbour who lived opposite us and has always been a great friend since we first moved in that house now over 30yrs ago,she had the fastest net curtains in the west but was so friendly even though we had 3 noisy little ones at the time.All are different to each other one a teacher/one a publican/one has 7 children and never does housework but I love her home and the comfort it ouses,so all very different from me and mine.