Exasperating !!!

[Libra Gran]

Taren has always been a wilful child rather how her Mother was as a child, since September I have been collecting them 2 days a week. Wednesday I pick them up from school at 3.15, home changed into ballet stuff, get them fresh water to go with their snack. They get a break between ballet and disco class.More or less with the odd time we are always late to get to class, it starts at 4.15. They bicker and argue but after I grumbled to DD how stressful it was they have been better, but today was horrendous. Taren does have a bit of a cold but I am not allowing this to be her excuse. From the minute she got into the car after school she was off on one of her hystryonics, saying M had pinched her etc etc.Poor Menna quite often gets blamed for what she hasn't done, and I was checking in the rear view mirror that M was indeed keeping her mitts to herself. Get home and more hysterics she wasn't getting ready for ballet, finally did with coercion.They I tried putting vaseline on her mouth and lips as I had been asked to do as they are a bit sore, that turned into another outburst. Finally got them in the car, late again. M had a peppermint this is a treat for being good, of course I wasn't going to give T one after todays fiasco and had informed her of such. Oh dear off she went again, kicking me in the back of my car seat, screaming please Granny, please Granny. But I stuck to my guns and she said she was telling Mummy I said please do, and Im sure Mummy will agree with me. I often threaten T she will have to go to after school club if she keeps playing up like this on a Wednesday. Sometimes feel I'm getting to old to put up with this nonsense, and boy does she make my smack botty hand itch

[ZIZI]

Well done for not letting your smack botty hand loose! I used to have a photocopy of my hand on fridge freezer when my boys were little with the words "I CAN use this" and if they were naughty I would march them into the utility room and point to it. Didn't always work.......

[Grauntie Mag]

I find if I ignore the squabbles and just say 'that's nice dear' every time tales are told they think I'm barking mad. They are right, but like you LG I feel too darned old to cope with their histrionics. They still squabble but I take no notice.😉

[Oma]

Oh they know how to push you don't they my friends 4 granddaughters could cause ww3 the way they fight and tell tale but if anyone tries to hurt one of them they wade in and protect each other like lions , My friend is a even tempered woman but even she has lost it at times with them . I have never had it with the boys I think if they had kicked the back of my seat my hand would have done more than itch ,

[Sum1Ls]

It sounds like one of the Horrid Henry stories, but with girl siblings. Put it on Taren's Christmas list! But seriously, sibling squabbling is horrible.

No foolproof solutions but you could try totally ignoring it, laughing at it, or, perhaps the most effective, call their bluff. Say calmly that she must stop now or she won't go to ballet. And stick to it. You'll probably only have to do it once.

And good luck.

[ZIZI]

When we have the three in the back of the car invariably Sadie and Joe will fight, mostly it is Joe being irritating but it does get on my nerves. I have been known to stop the car and tell them that I will put them on the side of the road and tell mummies and daddies to come and get them. That usually keeps them quiet for a while. Sometimes I tell them I DO NOT WANT ANOTHER WORD and after a minute or so you can hear them whispering "do you think we can speak now". Once I put Ben between them both but the poor child must have had a headache by the end of the trip with those two shouting at each other across him. Haven't done that since.

[Libra Gran]

Don't think the ballet thing would work Sum1Ls she isn't keen now, oh she begged and pleaded to be allowed to go like her sister but apparently she does ballet okay, but sometimes sits on the sidelines during disco.Personally I think its too long a session after a day at school, after all she's not 6 quite yet. I'm hoping denying her the peppermint has the desired effect. Usually for the sake of peace I relent and give her 1, but today I was resolute and this is new to her. Tomorrow they come straight here after school, so no rush to be anywhere. The joys of kiddies eh.

[Gemini]

As you say Libra, we are older now and can't / don't want to put up with this type of nonsense! My GD, 6, apart from the briefest of a Terrible Twos phase, has been good and easy, a pure joy to be with.
GS, 3, is equally adorable, but not equally fun to be with, due to tantrums etc.
The ups and downs of being a Grandma

[Daisy]

LG - I sympathise totally. GS1 and GS2 are the same - always squabbling and blaming each other. I usually just say "I don't want to know who did what to who" and ignore them, but that doesn't mean I'm serene and calm under the surface - quite the opposite!!

With the GDs it's usually not sharing toys that causes friction. GD1 hasn't got used to the idea yet that GD2 is no longer a baby and wants to play with the toys that GD1 thinks are hers alone. GD2 hasn't got the hang of taking it in turns yet, so these confrontations always end in at least one set of tears and a shouty granny!

[Bizzy Lizzy]

I have a pair of squabblers and bickerers too LG. GD1 is the culprit and winds up her brother who is now 11 and very quiet usually. She is an attention seeker with a very low boredom threshold and that plays a part in the behaviour. It wears me out to be honest. DH can't stand it in the car when he is driving as he says it is a dangerous distraction when he is trying to concentrate on traffic. It sometimes seems as if we are always telling her off but she is the source of the problem. She constantly corrects and contradicts her brother and answer questions that I ask him before he can open his mouth. They came on a sleepover last weekend and by the time she went home I was almost ready to strangle her!! I keep hoping she is improve with age - she is 8 and a half. Please someone tell me it gets better. I can't remember it being as bad as this with my two boys.

[Gemini]

I only had girls BL, and apart from very minor (but annoying!) squabbling between the first two who are close in age, no problems. I think it is a personality thing, not a gender thing

[ZIZI]

LG - I sympathise totally. GS1 and GS2 are the same - always squabbling and blaming each other. I usually just say "I don't want to know who did what to who" and ignore them, but that doesn't mean I'm serene and calm under the surface - quite the opposite!! :1

With the GDs it's usually not sharing toys that causes friction. GD1 hasn't got used to the idea yet that GD2 is no longer a baby and wants to play with the toys that GD1 thinks are hers alone. GD2 hasn't got the hang of taking it in turns yet, so these confrontations always end in at least one set of tears and a shouty granny!

Re sharing Daisy. When Joe was little and Ben was a baby we had them both. This was a rare occasion in Ben's early life due to His severe health difficulties. Husband was working, Ben was screaming his head off and would not be consoled, grandmas feathers were well and truly ruffled after three hours of the little one screaming blue murder. Granddad came in from work, grandma hands him Ben. Joe starts to cry. Grandma "what is the matter Joe?" He was jealous of granddad holding baby Ben. I explained that in this house we share. Joe with big tears rolling down cheeks and very pouting lips sobbed "yes toys, not granddad". Bless.

[Qwerty]

Oh dear Libra I haven't got to that stage yet although the twins do squabble over toys but that's to be expected with twins my eldest is an only one so she has no one to fall out with but on the subject of being too tired after school for other activities , she goes to swimming lessons on a Friday straight from school and have noticed when we have taken her she doesn't take notice of the instructor and always yawning she falls asleep in the car on the way home I don't think they get her to bed too early though . Bacardi sounds good LIbra !

[Libra Gran]

Another thing that makes me cross Qwerty, I don't think T goes to bed early enough, usually around 7.30 when mine at 5 years old were fed, bathed and in bed by 6.30. But of course I keep my thoughts to myself (just lol). Half the tine I'm sure her melt downs are sheer tiredness. Tonight she was as good as gold, ate everything without a grumble. Bless she is star of the week for her lovely story writing, love her to bits could just throttle her sometimes. As they are off to Lapland for 5 days on Monday next week I get a weeks reprieve Hallelujah.

[Daisy]

Bacardi sounds good LIbra !

Qwerty, I presume that would be for LG, not the GCs? If so, it sounds a very good idea.

Oh Zizi, poor Joe -happy to share mere toys but not his lovely Granddad! Awww, bless him.